When the Healing Begins with a Pen: Why I Wrote Boundaries, Not Barriers

I didn’t start out wanting to write a book.

I started with questions.Hard ones.Ones that kept me up at night and left my heart aching.

How do I set boundaries with people I love without feeling like I’m walking away from God’s command to love them?

What do I do when my peace keeps getting sacrificed for other people’s comfort?

And perhaps the hardest question of all: Why does drawing a line make me feel like the bad guy?

For years, I carried those questions — along with the guilt, the silence, and the weight of everyone else’s expectations. I tried to talk to people. I reached out to those I thought might understand. But what I found was that most people didn’t want to talk — not really. They wanted to text, skim, throw out a verse or a half-hearted “you’ll figure it out,” and move on.

So I turned to Scripture.To research.To prayer.And to writing.

Boundaries, Not Barriers: Peace Over People wasn’t born in a writing class or a publishing strategy. It was born in a season of spiritual exhaustion — the kind where you know something has to change or you’ll lose yourself trying to please everyone else.

As I studied the Bible with fresh eyes, I saw something I’d never fully grasped before:Boundaries are not rebellion. They’re biblical.

Jesus set boundaries.God created separation — light from dark, holy from unholy.He invites us to love deeply but live wisely.He calls us to guard our hearts — not to lock them up, but to keep them from being stolen.

The more I wrote, the more I healed.The more I explored the stories of others struggling with boundaries — daughters, sons, mothers, friends, spouses — the more I realized: this book wasn’t just helping me. It was written for every person who has ever sat in silence, wondering if peace with people always means war inside yourself.

Writing this book changed me.It strengthened my faith.It softened my heart.It helped me stop apologizing for protecting what God placed inside me.

Now, I want it to do the same for you.

Whether you’re burned out from people-pleasing, stuck in toxic cycles, grieving broken relationships, or simply trying to figure out how to say “no” and still be holy — this book is your companion.

It's filled with weekly devotionals, Scripture, personal stories, reflection questions, and real-life boundary-building tools. But more than that, it’s an invitation:

To choose peace.To stop carrying what isn’t yours.To honor God by honoring the lines He’s helping you draw.And to finally believe that boundaries aren't a betrayal of love — they're how we protect it.